Category: self improvement

hope, self improvement

Cleaning Out My Night Stand-Not Even Close to Cleaning Out My Closet

by SunshineLeave a Comment on Cleaning Out My Night Stand-Not Even Close to Cleaning Out My Closet

The healing ????

It took me over 2 hours to clean out my side table. Not mine and my husbands, just mine. It’s one of those things that had been somewhere on the “To-Do” list, somewhere down low enough that it was forgotten.

It all started because my sister-in-law posted on Instagram that she was doing some cleaning and organization thing that Ashley Rose Reeves was doing. I didn’t think much of it except for the fact that my sister-in-law has four young girls and a cute house that is clean and well kept everytime I see it. I’ll admit it was a bit of an eye roll from me because her house already seems de-cluttered to me and in better condition than mine.

I had no intentions of joining this cleaning and organizing movement that @ashleyrosereeves was doing. Until, we were leaving my brothers teams basketball game and I made a comment that my nightstand was discusting and I really need to clearn it out. My daughter responded with something like, “your entire room grosses me out!”. Ouch! It’s true the truth does hurt and there’s nothing I appreciate more than a healthy dose of truth. I figured the side table would be a small task, needs to be done and I’ll feel accomplished. I started what I thought would be a quick task I would’ve guessed it would take me 30 minutes.

At first I was laughing and joking about it. I was shocked by the number of books and magazines that I had shoved under there. It filled a Home Depot storage box. There were so many random items, pictures, coasters, camera’s, bullets, jewelery that I have and never worn and have no intentions of wearing, etc. Why in the world have I kept so much stuff?

By the time I reached the two hour mark the laughter from earlier had stopped. My husband had gone to bed and I was left with my thougts. I slowly started to realize how disconnected I’ve been.. I’ve been in survival mode for at least 2 years. I’ve worked long hours at work and my home and family life have been sacrificed. I just can’t live that way anymore.

I see the value that it brings me to have a clean space. I know it effects my mood. And I know it’s time to change it. Consistency is key as it is easy to fall back into hold habits.

faith, God, kindness counts, self improvement

What if God doesn’t exist?

by SunshineLeave a Comment on What if God doesn’t exist?

What if when we die we’re just bured in the ground or burned to ashes and that’s the end of the story? 

What if there is no bright light or pearly gates? 

What if there’s no one there to great us when we die? 

What if we die and no loved ones to run to us and hug us?

What if this life wasn’t a test or just an experience?

What if there will be no one there to judge us according to our behavior and the way we treated others on this earth?

What if there is no God?

What if there is no Jesus?

Oh but what if there is?

Suppose we live a life of prayer, church and scripture and turns out none of it was true. Would it mean that the kindness or unkindness we show and the things we do matter any less or that our kindness didn’t count? Perhaps we should ask the people we are kind or unkind to. It matters to them and makes a difference in their life. Kindness counts. It doesn’t matter if you believe in God or not. In the end if none of it was true I will have lived a better life because I believe that God is real.

faith, hope, self improvement

Saved From Drowning

Featuredby SunshineLeave a Comment on Saved From Drowning

We were on a family trip with my in-laws in Mazatlan Mexico. We were hanging out on the beach relaxing when I decided I wanted to go play in the ocean. The sea was angry that day my friends. A big wave came and hit me in the back of my knees, it slammed me down under the water. I tried to adjust my swimsuit that was all twisted as I moved a little further out into deeper water. A wave hit me knocked me down and pulled me out further into the ocean. I had never experienced an undercurrent like that and it freaked me out.  When my head came up out of the water my hair was completely covering my face I couldn’t see anything. I went under water to try to wash my hair back out of my face so I could see. When I came up I got hit in the face by another wave, apparently my mouth was open and everything because I swallowed salt water and was coughing and choking. Salt water was in my closed eyes, I knew how ridiculous I must look to everyone on shore.  I had so much sand in the crotch of my swimsuit I would look like a man if I were to stand up. So I was trying to wash the sand out of the bottom of my swimsuit as I got slammed again by another wave. This kept repeating over and over. I would get knocked down, flipped around in the water, I was dizzy and disoriented.

My husband seeing the distress I was in came out to help me. I was so relieved when I felt him grab my arm to help me. I got hit by another wave and was knocked under water again a few more times. He kept saying “Babe, are you serious?” I was still getting knocked under water, coughing and choking.  All I could think about was how overwhelming it was, how were there so many waves hitting me so quickly back to back and completely owning me? I was a wreck. “Babe are you serious?” He said again. I was laughing at my struggle, he was laughing. I was still trying to not take anymore water in my face. I said “Babe! HELP!” He calmly said “Stand up!”

I was confused.  I then placed one foot in the sand and wobbled as I stood up. I was still dizzy and he helped to stabilize me as I held onto him laughing so hard trying to now stand on my own two feet. My body was so tired from trying to fight all the strong waves. I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t even realize I was on my knees. I had been knocked down and moved around but I kept going back to my knees.  We now jokingly refer to this as the day he saved me from drowning. 

As I was looking for a picture the other day I came across a picture of my husband and I standing on the beach after this had happened. I thought about the similarities to that event and how life can be that way at times. Sometimes I get so focused on how hard and overwhelming life can be, how much there is to do and get caught up in all that’s going on right now. Sometimes it seems like I keep getting knocked down and slammed in the face by one thing after another.  It’s especially easy to get disoriented in life if we don’t have a specific focus.  At times it may take getting knocked to my knees to make me realize I need to spend a moment on my knees asking for help (and I don’t mean from just my husband). Then, stand up, dust myself off, hopefully laugh a little, see the big picture and move on.  

It breaks my heart to think of people who think that it will never get better. That things will never change.  Things can always get better in life and we are all capable of change.  Sometimes it’s our perspective that’s a bigger problem than what we are actually dealing with or going through.